Although John knew it, he had exactly 44 bobble heads on his desk that needed cleaning. His dog Trevor dashed into the room with a pink calendar in his mouth. Sensitive to his dog’s nature, he chuckled and proceeded to his computer only to find that a virus had taken over and it was now downloading 50.7 Terabytes of Pornography.
On the table in the dining room were a purple rose and a red polka dot cookie. John’s mother Maria was busy in the kitchen with the food. What happened next was quite unexpected.
The fan that was spinning, unhooked itself and fell down, and sent the dog running and yelping out of the house. This in turn caused the table to go over to the left of the room sending cutlery and silverware into the microwave. The cookie on the table, was sent flying into the air and smashed into the Touch-Sensitive keypad of the microwave, sending it on a two hour course of cooking which included a session of grilling as well.
Due to the amount of metal present in the microwave, it started shuddering and shaking, while Maria and John came out of their respective rooms of indulgence to inspect the current events unfolding before them.
Before they knew it, the microwave was about to explode, while a butterfly flew into the house, settled itself on the wall and watched the proceedings. The microwave then exploded, sending 625.741 pieces into the surrounding areas.
Precisely at that point, John’s father Lesley called in from his car phone to tell the family that he was going to arrive for lunch, but he spotted a baby turtle and a frog on the road and swerved to avoid them, thereby sending the car into a field of corn and cotton. Lesley’s car smashed into one of the farm’s husking machines and was therefore of no use. So he tried calling home again to tell the family that he had now found corn for his lunch and free cotton to make a coat and spend the night on the farm till his car was fixed. He also would be indulging in farm activities inclusive of but not limited to: butter and cheese making, distilling local alcohol and milking the cows.
Meanwhile, back at home, Maria and John were assessing the damage that had been done. John decided to call the repairman, who told him that he was indulging in a game of darts while juggling tarts with his left had at his grandmother’s tea party, rendering himself useless. So, John called the fire brigade because he thought it was good sport. The Fire Brigade however, was currently in the middle of a typical Irish drinking party. Surprised by the turn of events, John and Maria went back to their respective rooms and decided to take care of the matter later.
Meanwhile, the butterfly landed on the gas cylinder valve, setting off the gas out of control, while somebody on the road lit a cigarette and there was a huge explosion. The dog had returned to a ruined pile of concrete rubble of what used to be a house.
Due to this event, the climatic battle for the………………. Was not exactly………by the same ga……..right past the old sail, next to the slimy………………………..rotten eggs in the basket…………………………while a crippled ……………….saw the extent of the consequences of farting behind a girl………………………
At this point, the author was suddenly paralyzed by a stroke, while writing the story on his way to a flower show complete with dancing girls. As his stroke progressed, he decided that he would fight for his life to complete the story. As can be seen, he could not. He was taken to a hospital and placed on an electric fully functional wheelchair with a computer translator to communicate and write short stories. However, on attempting to do so, he jammed the wrong control sending the wheelchair out of control, which spun 746 degrees, went down a flight of stairs and into the crematorium where it smashed against a table sending the author flying into one of the cremation chambers while it was in operation.
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